What do you want to be when you grow up Emily?

I've always been creative, for as long as I can remember.

My mother cuts out sea creatures made of wood, she paints them, carefully, each one. I watch her from wide eyes. It's not a necessity, they're only going to be hung up in mine and my brothers bedroom. But they're cute and they fit above my bunk bed, and they look so nice on the lime green walls, a little blue octopus with it's legs carved into wood.


There's collage materials everywhere, I'm in a villa, in Spain, my grandparents. My mother is next to me, and I'm so excited at all the glue and paper sitting in front of me. I'm in my pyjamas and I'm cutting out shapes to make my grandad's face, his moustache and hair, with big googly eyes. It's still on my Nan's fridge, 19 years later.

My mother jokingly asked me this question the other day and honestly I still don't know the answer. It's something that's drilled into our very existence, something we think about all throughout school, but I think the real question is, who do you want to be? What kind of person do you want to be?

Maybe we aren't a fireman or the next Steve Jobs, maybe our aspirations aren't to be the next richest person on the planet but to be surrounded by the things we love the most. Family, friends, because if none of those are in the equation, what kind of life do we lead? Now I'm not saying that people shouldn't have aspirations, but often aspirations are false. They're unrealistic. Money makes the world go round, that is true, but we're constantly told to have a career and build up the ladder to be successful. But I want to challenge the meaning of being 'successful', I want to be the person living my dreams, but not in the 'I make a shit ton of money sense'.

The reason I'm taking a break from university is so I can reconnect. I've lost my mojo and I really want to be creative again, regenerate myself and use my spare time to reconnect with the things I love, the reasons that made me join in the first place! But I had to take some time for myself to make that happen.

So in answer to the question.. What do I want to be when I grow up? Well, I want to be my friend not my enemy, I want to wake up to my best friend, I want to travel, I want music, I want adventure, discovery, I want to push myself to very ends of my own limits and challenge myself, I want to beat my demons, I want to create and inspire. I want to say 'I did it because I could.'

Its all very exciting isn't it?